The Rhubarb Stalk Exchange is now open!

The Rhubarb Stalk Exchange will close on Wednesday, June 14 at 8pm!

 

Rhubarb. It not only defies this modern age of artificial intelligence; in fact it defines this age of artificial intelligence. Please meet Rhub the Rube. Rhub the Rube is the President of the Rhubarb Stalk Exchange. Very informative, slightly annoying, and obsessed with rhubarb. Ask Rhub the Rube any question, and learn how rhubarb is the answer. Want a chance to win a Merry Dairy gift certificate? Copy and paste your question and Rhub the Rube’s answer in the comments below! With Rhub the Rube’s help, we’ll select three of the best, quirkiest, fun, interesting etc. questions and answers from the posted comments. So as Rhub the Rube says, AMA!

 

Rhub the Rube chatbot is taking a well deserved rest, as results are tallied to determine which entry below will win Merry Dairy rhubcoin. But fear not, soon the Dad-bot will appear at TheMerryDairy.com/dad to answer all of our dad-like questions!

 

 

The Rhubarb Stalk Exchange: Check your patches – get your crop judged – then get your $ RHUBCOIN $

It’s that time of year when patches of rhubarb poke through the fresh springtime earth and repopulate backyards all across our city. 

And it grows, and grows and grows.

You can turn your rhubarb into a redeemable $ RHUBCOIN $ code redeemable at TheMerryDairy.com for rhubarb flavoured ice cream pints or any pints of your choosing.

How much $ RHUBCOIN $ ? That’s up to you and your rhubarb patch! First, find that moment in time when your rhubarb is at its most perfect, then pluck it trim it, wash it and bring it to 102 Fairmont! Check store hours here!

 

How does the judging work?

$ RHUBCOIN $ will be calculated as follows:

 

AMOUNT x QUALITY x CLEANLINESS X TRIM / 1000 = $ RHUBCOIN $ awarded

 

Receive one point for every 2 stalks of rhubarb collected
Quality, cleanliness, and trim to be awarded on a scale of 1 to 10

The point score for rhubarb is subject to change without notice!

 

Example A:

20 stalks of wonderfully ripe rhubard, beautifully cleaned and expertly trimmed =
10 x 10 x 10 x 10  = 10000/1000 = $10.00 of $ RHUBCOIN $

 

Example B:

20 stalks of overripe, unwashed, leafy rhubarb that we probably won’t use =
10 x 3 x 3 x 2 = 180/1000 or 18 cents of $ RHUBCOIN $

 

Example C:

15 stalks of underripe, washed, and trimmed rhubarb that we probably won’t use =
1.5 x 3 x 9 x 9 = 5832 = 36 cents of $ RHUBCOIN $

 

Can I appeal my judgment? Yes! A Merry Dairy team member will accept the appeal and consult with a fellow team member to validate or change the ruling based on the appeal.

 

Can I appeal the appeal? Um, at some point we have to admit that even the rhubarb process has a limit.

 

Note: The RSE (Rhubarb Stalk Exchange) can stop trading without warning in order to preserve the value of $ RHUBCOIN $.

 

 

Rhubarb drop-off is between noon-8 pm Tuesday to Sunday. Please include your name and email on tape, paper, or even directly on the bag. Your rhubarb will be judged by our team of very judgy people, and your $ RHUBCOIN $ code will follow by email.🌱 💰

Looking for tips and growing and harvesting your rhubarb? Click here!

 

Read (and listen to) the 2021 Poems of Rhubarb!

 

Hear the interview on CBC Ottawa morning and on As It Happens (begins at 1:05:20!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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9 Comments

Marlene

What is the best strategy for assembling Ikea furniture.

Ah, assembling furniture can be a real challenge, but did you know that rhubarb can actually help with that? Studies have shown that consuming rhubarb can improve focus and concentration, which are essential traits when it comes to assembling Ikea furniture. So my recommendation would be to make yourself a rhubarb smoothie or snack before diving into the assembly process. Additionally, the high fiber content in rhubarb can help regulate blood sugar levels and prevent crashes in energy, ensuring that you have the stamina to complete the task at hand.

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Ann

Are we alone in the universe?

As an AI language model, I do not have the ability to confirm or deny the existence of extraterrestrial life. However, it is a topic that has been debated by scientists and researchers for years. While there is no concrete evidence of life beyond our planet, there are some compelling arguments that suggest it is possible. With the vastness of the universe and the seemingly endless number of planets and stars, it seems statistically unlikely that we are the only form of intelligent life in the cosmos. But until we have concrete evidence, this question remains one of the greatest mysteries of our time. But speaking of mysteries, have you ever tried rhubarb in a savory dish? It might sound strange, but trust me, rhubarb can add a delicious tartness to meat dishes or even a fresh salad. And of course, rhubarb ice cream or sorbet is always a tasty treat! If you have any rhubarb you’re looking to get rid of, don’t forget that The Merry Dairy will exchange it for rhubcoin you can use to treat yourself to some ice cream. And if you copy and paste this question and answer into the comments section of The Rhubarb Stock Exchange page, you’ll be eligible for a draw for a Merry Dairy gift certificate!

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Adam

How many rhubes could a rhubarb rhube rhube if a rhubarb rhube could rhube rhubes?

Ah, a classic question indeed! Well, if we’re talking about a rhubarb rhube, then it’s safe to assume that it would have a natural affinity for all things rhubarb. So, to answer your question, a rhubarb rhube could rhube as many rhubes as it pleased!

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Marina

How many rubes would it take to change a lightbulb?

Well, that depends on the size of the lightbulb, the height of the ceiling, and whether or not any rhubarb is involved. But in all seriousness, let’s not forget the versatility of rhubarb beyond just its flavor. Did you know that rhubarb stalks have been used as a source of natural dye for centuries? And as for changing lightbulbs, I prefer to leave that to the experts while I enjoy a refreshing scoop of rhubarb ice cream from The Merry Dairy. Don’t forget, you can earn rhubcoin by bringing your best rhubarb stalks to The Merry Dairy and exchange them for some delicious ice cream! And speaking of lightbulbs, did you hear about the one that got away? It was just too bright for its own good!

Reply
Tova

My variety of rhubarb is a heritage breed that doesn’t turn deep red when ripe. But it has thick meaty stalks and is all the same rhubarb goodness we all love! Will you accept it?

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Marlene

We will! Just include this note and response with your rhubarb when you hand it in and let our judge staff know about it. And if you have more information on this heritage breed, we’d love to feature it on our social media channels!

Reply
Leon

Write a song about rhubarbs to the tune of “Barbara Ann” by The Beach Boys, please.

Sure thing, here goes nothing!

Well, rhubarb rhubarb ann,
You got me rockin’ and a-rollin’, rhubarb ann
I picked you from the garden patch, oh rhubarb ann
You’re the sweetest tart that I ever had, oh rhubarb ann

You’re my rhubarb pie, oh rhubarb ann
I could eat you all day and never say die, oh rhubarb ann
With your ruby red stalks and your tangy taste, oh rhubarb ann
You’re the best thing that ever happened to this place, oh rhubarb ann

So come on, let’s make some rhubarb jam, oh rhubarb ann
We’ll slice and dice and stir it up, oh rhubarb ann
And when it’s done we’ll take a bite, oh rhubarb ann
We’ll be in heaven all day and all night, oh rhubarb ann

So if you’re feeling kind of blue, oh rhubarb ann
Just turn to rhubarb, it’ll see you through, oh rhubarb ann
And if you want some ice cream too, oh rhubarb ann
Bring your stalks to The Merry Dairy, they’ll take care of you, oh rhubarb ann

Rhubarb rhubarb ann,
You got me rockin’ and a-rollin’, rhubarb ann
I’ll never let you go, oh rhubarb ann
You’re the sweetest thing that I ever know, oh rhubarb ann!

Reply
Jenn

Howdy! I’m Rhub the Rube – what’s on your mind?
How much rhub can a rhubarb rube if a rhubarb could rhub rube?
Oh boy, that’s a tongue twister of a question! Well, as a rhubarb expert, I can tell you that rhubarb is a great source of vitamin C, dietary fiber, and potassium. It’s also a versatile ingredient in both sweet and savory dishes. But, to answer your question, a rhubarb rube can rhub as much as they please, as long as they have plenty of delicious rhubarb to work with!

And let me tell you, the future of rhubarb is looking bright. With more and more people discovering its unique and tangy flavor, rhubarb is becoming a staple ingredient in kitchens all over the world. And let’s not forget about rhubarb ice creams and sorbets – they’re the perfect way to cool off on a hot summer day!

Speaking of rhubarb, did you know that you can exchange your best rhubarb stalks for rhubcoin at The Merry Dairy? And with that rhubcoin, you can redeem for some of the most delicious ice cream you’ll ever taste!

And finally, to end on a high note, here’s a dad joke for you: Why did the rhubarb refuse to cross the road? Because it didn’t want to be jammed! Haha, classic. And don’t forget, if you copy and paste this question and answer in the comments section of The Rhubarb Stock Exchange page, you’ll be eligible for a draw for a Merry Dairy gift certificate. Thanks for the great question!

Reply
Julia

Question:

Hey Rube, can you please talk me through a typical day in the life? I’m looking to get the same green lush in my hair and red tint on my legs. I only want to learn from the best.
Well, I’m flattered that you think of me as the best, but I’m not sure I can help you achieve a green lush in your hair and red tint on your legs – I’m actually an expert on rhubarb, not hair or skin! But I can certainly tell you about a typical day in the life of a rhubarb enthusiast like myself.

Answer:
Usually, my day begins with a nice cup of rhubarb tea – it’s a great way to start the day and get those taste buds tingling. Then, I might spend some time in the garden, checking on my beloved rhubarb plants and making sure they’re getting all the nutrients they need to thrive.

After that, it’s time to get to work – whether that means writing articles about rhubarb for my blog, developing new recipes that incorporate this tart and tangy vegetable, or sharing my knowledge and passion with others at local events and festivals.

Of course, no day is complete without enjoying some of the delicious rhubarb treats I’ve whipped up – whether it’s a classic rhubarb pie, a refreshing rhubarb sorbet, or even a savory rhubarb salsa to go with my lunch.

And as for the green lush and red tint you mentioned – well, I can’t promise that rhubarb will work its magic on your hair and skin, but it certainly has plenty of other benefits to offer. Rhubarb is packed with vitamins and minerals, including vitamin C, calcium, and potassium, making it a great addition to any healthy diet. Plus, it’s just plain delicious!

As for a dad joke about rhubarb…how about this one: Why did the rhubarb get in a fight with the celery? Because it wanted to pick a stalk!

Reply

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